Swanson-Martell Natural Laws of Fishing

1. Anything that can get caught in the net, will be (including, but not limited to, boat handles, anchors, cinch straps, boat grommets, fingers, boat plugs, rolls of spare rope, dip nets, oars, buckets, other nets, and miscellaneous gear)

2. Super Hooker (TM) anchors will hook on absolutely anything (except lake bottoms).

3. Sideline (rope used on nets, anchors, etc) will knot, wrap itself around, entangle, trap, and encumber anything and everything within a 10 m radius (including boat handles, anchors, cinch straps, etc). In particular, sideline, upon encountering itself, will spontaneously, and at approximately the speed of nuclear fusion, become a massive Gordion knot involving 3 times the amount of sideline present within a 100' radius and resembling a Narcisse garter snake hibernaculum.

Laws 1, 2, and 3 act concurrently, catalytically, and catastrophically.